Street illegal

By Amanda Gillooly
O-R Staff Writer
agillooly@observer-reporter.com

I’m a writer, but I know I’ll never be a Shakespeare or a Hemmingway. And while I enjoy throwing the football around, I know I’ll never make it to the pros. That doesn’t diminish my skills. It’s just reality.

That word – reality – must not be that popular among some racing fans, who must honestly think they are Dale Earnhardt Jr. or some other such popular driver. I see them all the time and it always makes me laugh. While driving home from work on Interstate 79 last Friday, I encountered a white minivan. My first clues that it was trouble were the various stickers on the bumper – numbers that I recognize as representing NASCAR, but have no intimate knowledge of.

Cruising at 70 mph, I quickly signaled my intent to turn, where I got a better look at the ridiculousness. There just had to be more. And there was – a bright fire decal running down the sides. But I’ve seen sillier. There always seems to be the guy driving a 1989 Toyota Camry, weaving in-and-out of traffic, more rust than metal showing. While it is clear that he believes the car makes him able to perform NASCAR-worthy stunts, I’m betting the whole frame starts to shake when he goes more than 62 mph.

Even though that was clear to me, he obviously doesn’t get it. The spinner wheels, racing stripe and pimped-out exhaust don’t make the rusty road warrior anything more than it is: A 1989 Toyota Camry. Even Dale Jr. would tell him that.